Photo: Rickie Rizza

If I got half a dime every time someone asked my astrological sign, I’d be writing this blog out of a castle in Cyprus. Somehow, ownership of luxury property on a Greek island sounds more probable to me than the stars affecting mine – or anyone else’s – temperament and destiny. But, the world loves astrology and, despite its rejection by the scientific community as a pseudoscience and superstition, you’ll have a hard time finding someone who doesn’t indulge in it every once in a while. Doctors, lawyers, teachers, even politicians identify themselves as Virgos, Cancers, Capricorns. People around the world wake up every morning to eagerly consume their daily horoscopes from the back of a newspaper, on the radio, delivered straight to their email. Some read it just for fun; others’ daily plans are hinged upon the predictions. With the world frantically trying to decide whether Aries is really compatible with Taurus, I found myself thinking:

What is it about astrology that evokes such fascination?

Astrology is an ancient system which attempts to understand human personality and interactions based on the relative locations of the celestial bodies. It claims to explain the past, the present and even predict the future by the same principle. It was called a symbolic language, an art form, a form of divination. By examining celestial patterns throughout history, astrology resembles theism – both look for a greater purpose in apparently chaotic events.

As far as the Zodiac goes, it’s a mechanism of self-identification: if you were born and know your date of birth at least approximately, you are instantly given a sign which you display proudly for life – sort of like that gold star you got in preschool. My sister says that talking about birthdays – and by extension astrology – helps her bond with other people. It’s sort of like a universally-accepted religion that everyone knows and understands.

Astrology: a modern-day religion?

It sure feels like it sometimes. Last week I was in a line to get a muffin with two fairly intelligent 20-something women in front of me. One was ruminating on the wonderful relationships she seems to have with the Pisces, while swearing off the Sagittariuses for being ‘heartless, avoidant jerks’ (I couldn’t help but feel a little offended for all my December-born friends). I don’t know about Cyprus, but in New York City it is not a socially acceptable behavior to tell a stranger to stop being a whiny Libra and try judging people on merit, not an astrological sign. It’s like telling a Muslim to lose the burka and go find Jesus – you just don’t do it! So I fulfilled my civilian duty by fuming silently, and eventually accepting the fact that to some people, being a Leo means something, god damn it!

Is it too narrow-minded of me to refuse to be pinpointed into a category based on my date of birth? I was born in the month of June, which makes me a Gemini. I prefer to think of myself as a human with an array of merits and shortcomings, but astrologists insist that I am a “communicative, witty person who can be inconsistent at times and have trouble making decisions”. Most of these are too vague to qualify as personal characteristics (who hasn’t been witty, chatty, changed their mind and had a hard time making a decision every once in a while?). But, insofar as my defining traits go, I wouldn’t use any of the above with a possible exception of wit – however intermittent.

After reading about other signs, I was flabbergasted to uncover that I had behaved in a very Virgo-esque fashion on Monday, pulled an Aquarius on Tuesday, and was a total Capricorn on Wednesday! James Randi, a famous skeptic, proves that horoscopes don’t really work in this simple experiment:

Are horoscopes self-fulfilling prophecies?

By buying into horoscopes wholeheartedly, we allow them to become a self-fulfilling prophecy. This can be a good thing if it’s the neatness of the Virgo, determination of the Scorpio, and compassion of the Cancer. But there is no reason to use it as an excuse for your laziness (Leo), mistake lack of discipline for indecisiveness (Libra) and explain a full-blown case of ADD by being your ole’ fickle Gemini self (haha).

When all is said and done, astrology is nothing but a harmless pastime to most, a form of entertainment. People who regard it as a reliable source of information are far in between. As long as my dentist doesn’t base his decision about my root canal on a copy of Esoteric Astrology, I think I’ll be ok. And if he tries to bond with me over us both being Geminis, I’ll just pretend the Cyprus deal is on.

Bitch-slap of irony: I asked my astrology-illiterate husband to name one common trait amongst all the Geminis he knows. His reply was, “They are all sort of mercurial” – which, of course, happens to be the defining characteristic of the sign. Either he’s been reading up on that Esoteric Astrology at the dentist’s, or there is something to that stuff, after all.


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Deerlings: do you believe in astrology?